


Five Times Keith Kogane Didn't Call Krolia 'Mom' and One Time He Did

by hoard_of_stars



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Awkward Keith (Voltron), Blood and Injury, Bonding Moments, F/M, Family Bonding, Five Plus One, Fluff, Keith (Voltron) is Bad at Feelings, Krolia (Voltron) is a Good Parent, M/M, MAMA KOGANE AND BABY KOGANE BONDING MOMENTS, Parental Krolia (Voltron), Socially Awkward Keith (Voltron), Supportive Krolia (Voltron), The Doctor (Doctor Who) Loves Her, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, but he loves his mom, mentions of texas kogane (hot damn)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-03-23
Updated: 2019-03-27
Packaged: 2019-11-13 06:36:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,593
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18026627
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hoard_of_stars/pseuds/hoard_of_stars
Summary: Krolia thought she had reached a milestone with her son. She didn't want to leave him, it had practically torn her apart to do so in the first place. And now that she knew her lover was dead, she was trying even harder to make amends. She thought they had bonded in some small way or form, even in a major way. She loved her son. That was her son, and no amount of years away from him could change that.So why wouldn't he call her mom?





	1. Insomnia

** Two Months **

It's the middle of the night, and I can't sleep. Or is it the middle of the day? The afternoon? Time has become a blur ever since we left Earth and landed on Arus. I'm trying not to lose my mind out here. 

It's dark out here, and I can't sleep, I can't sleep, _I can't sleep_.

Space is cold. The only heat we know is the heat of battle. And, god, it's so cold in here I think I'm going to freeze.

My room is plain, it's empty, and it _feels_ just the same. I can see the outlines of the plain walls in the dark, and it reminds me of how little I have to lose. Pidge's room has everything and then some. She has two trash floofs from the trash planet she crash landed on, her computers, maps, photos, clothes-  _everything_. 

And me? I have nothing. 

Well, I think bitterly, I have something. One thing. Two things. Someone. I have Shiro, at least. And Krolia. I have her now.

The hallway creaks and I reach for my knife out of habit, bolting upright in bed. There's a figure standing in the doorway. Before I can even think, I tackle the person standing there. I don't know who they are, but they're not supposed to be there. My knife is against someone's throat, and someone is screaming, maybe it's me... 

"Hey- _hey_ , calm down, it's me!" Someone's voice rings out in a hushed shout and my shoulder is being gripped tightly. My survival instincts go into overdrive and I break out of the grip in a fluid, harsh motion, lashing out with my knife. It hits a mark. A pained grunt. I hear blood spattering the floor.

Only then does it occur to me that my throat is aching and dry, my face is wet, and  _how would an intruder be aboard the Castle and nobody have been notified?_

The light switches on , and Krolia is standing there, gripping her arm. The sleeve of her shirt is wet. I feel my face burn and something runs down my face. I don't know why my bones are on fire but I'd give my Marmora blade to be freezing again. 

She reaches out to me and I step back a little. Krolia shakes her head and rips a sliver of fabric off the hem of her pant leg, swiftly tying it into a knot around the stab wound. She turns her gaze to me and holds out a hand towards me once more. I flinch away, holding up my knife defensively. Her expression contorts, then hardens.

"Keith."

I can't bring myself to look her in the eye.

"What happened to you on Earth? This..." she waves her arm loosely. "This is not normal human behavior. No human I ever met flinched when someone tried to hug them."

I still can't look at her. My body aches underneath my clothing. 

Krolia's eyes widen slightly, pupils dilating. "Did they...  _hurt_ you?"

I don't speak.

"Keith, answer me! Did they hurt you?  _Did they_?"

A broken sob I didn't know was building up tumbled out of my throat and my shoulders shake. Then someone's arms wrap around me and I struggle momentarily. Then the hold loosens and it feels comfortable,  _safe_ , even.

"I want names. I want locations. I want severity on a scale of one to ten and I  _will_ hijack this Castle-ship and bring us to Earth for the sole purpose of ending  _anyone  _who ever harmed a floofy hair on your head," she says. Her voice is muffled and thick and broken-sounding.

Then she whispers, "I should never have left you. I never should have even considered it. I am... I am an  _awful_ mother."

Somewhere between the tears and the heavy silence I locked my arms around her too, and  _wow is this what it feels like to hug your mom, like they describe it in poems and books and short stories_?

"Do you know how scared I was when I realized I was going to have you? Your father, he nearly cried with happiness and I nearly cried for a very different reason. I never saw myself fit to be a mother, responsible for another life form. And to know that I had passed onto you the burden of being this half-breed alien/human hybrid? I was quaking.  _I was so scared, Keith_. Even now, I don't find myself fit to be a mother, and I worry for you... that maybe I'm not fit to do this for you. I couldn't even protect you."

"It wasn't your fault, though," I croak out. "I'm- I'm  _weak_ , Krolia, I couldn't do anything to save myself. I'm not b-brave, I'm not like you- like you or d-dad or even fucki-ing Y-Yorak- my space wold is braver than me!"

"Hey." Fingers raise my chin so that I'm staring into eyes that mirror my own. They slowly drift towards my eyes and brush the tears from my eyes. She lets me collapse in her arms, but I know what we both feel right now. It's haunting.

_Grief stricken._

"You know when you were just a kit, you were just beginning to crawl and babble nonsensically when I left. Your father- he never understood. But I always knew you were trying to say something. We would hold conversations, I would sit on the porch with you and ask your opinion on the weather and you would point at the sun or lift your face up to the rain and screech." She smiles faintly at the memory, eyes in a faraway place.

I begin to realize what she is trying to do. It was working. "Really?" I ask, sniffling and feeling the corners of my mouth twitch.

"Yeah, really. And, you know, once I asked you how you felt about one of those very rare... what did your father call it? Ah.  _Snowfalls_ , he called them. It was the first one in a few years, he had said. And I took you outside at night when the stars were shining and that...  _snow_... was thickly coating the ground. You didn't like it.I knew this. Your father, however..." Krolia grimaces. " _If he's a real Kogane, he won't have any problem with harsh weather._ That was what he said. Exact words."

"And what happened?" I say slowly.

She lets out a scratchy laugh. "I gave up convincing your father you didn't like that sky-dandruff and went inside to get what your he called a camera, an Earth device that could record and capture scenes. Amazing technology, I tell you. You couldn't tell that man anything, I don't know how I fell for him." Her nose wrinkles and she looks momentarily annoyed. "stubborn, like you."

" _But what happened_?" I insist. 

"You were screaming your lungs out because he put you down in the sky-dandruff. I picked you up and brought you inside but, wouldn't you know it, you contracted an Earth illness called a cold a few days later. Your father swore it wasn't his fault. I tried taking care of the illness myself, but I'm not... that knowledgeable when it comes to Earth illnesses," she admits, and I could see how much it took out of her to admit that weakness. "So both of us wound up with sore throats and runny, stuffed up noses- do you know how much I took being able to breathe normally granted in those days, Keith?" 

A laugh slips out of my throat. "How much of...  _us_... do you remember?"

Her gaze is distant. "Everything. As much as I can bear to. But sometimes I wished I could forget... I volunteered for so many missions out of the guilt of leaving you. That my... my boy would grow up without his mother, purple alien and weird face markings and all. A boy needs his mother just as much as he needs his father. Oh, Keith, if I had only been there..."

A sudden coldness settles in my stomach. "Well, I mean... I guess I understand now. You put the mission above all else."

"No." Her words are cutting and cold. "No." 

I blink up at her. "What?"

"That's untrue. Wherever you heard that, whoever told you- that's not true." Her voice is frustrated and I'm reminding myself that this is my mother. She wouldn't hurt me. Not intentionally. "I left to protect the people I love most. Because, Keith? I'd rather never have seen you again but know you were alive and well because I left than stay and have to watch you and your father die. I  _know_ that I would never be able to live with myself then. I know it."

All I can manage is a very small  _oh._

She takes a deep breath, scrubbing at her eyes with her palms. She winces as she moves her arms.

"Come down to the healing pods," I offer. "We have some salves for small injuries. It should heal the wound in about an hour or so. Or, um, sixty doboshes."

"That sounds good. And, if you wouldn't mind, maybe afterwards we can watch pictures strung together to form moving images and I can tell you about your father and what happened while I was there."

"You mean... a movie? An animation?"

"Well, I'm sorry if I'm not current on Earth vocabulary after eighteen years, you mullet child."

"You literally have the same thing."

"Yes, but mine is beautiful and well maintained. Yours looks like you haven't washed it in weeks." I look away from her and she groans. "You haven't, have you?"

"I was on a mission!"

"Personal hygiene!"

"It's just hair. Dead cells!"

"Your father was a handsome human. I know I'm not ugly. You should be the epitome of the sun's radiance, the tears of every goddess of love and beauty combined!" she sputtered, shaking her head at me. "You can bathe in the morning. I already nicked a 'movie' from Pidge's room. She let me borrow it. It's called...  _Birdbox_?"

"We're not watching that without stealing food from the kitchens. Let's go. And we can grab the salve too."

We start off down the halway together, and I feel the inexplicable need to say something, anything, to show my thanks. She wasn't there before, but she's here now, and I would give my Marmora blade to keep her. So, without thinking, I nudge her shoulder. 

"Hm?"

"Uh, I just wanted to say thanks. For- for being there, you know? It's not like with Shiro or Coran... but I feel more safe with you. So I just wanted to say thanks... thanks, Krolia."

A brief flash of hurt that i can barely comprehend plays on her features for a split second, and then she's smiling at me, arm around my shoulder.

"No problem, kiddo. No problem at all."

 


	2. Bonding Moments

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bonding moments are brought up and argued. Hunk makes cookies and other happenings.

Krolia and I walked into the dining hall together. We hadn't slept the better part of the night because we were up watching  _Birdbox_ , but that was irrelevant. Needless to say, it was quite easy for everyone to see who had slept and who hadn't.

"Morning," I yawned as I slid into a chair, slumping against the table.

"Fuck off," Krolia mumbled, waving away the mice, who were scampering up her arms. They squeaked, offended, and ran to Allura, who gathered them in her arms.

"Two kinds of morning people," she muttered, trying to conceal a grin. "It's alright, mice. Leave them alone for a while. Thank goodness today's a day off. I'm going with Coran to do repairs. It's been a while since we've had some bonding time." I twitched at the mention of bonding but did my best to hide it as she walked off with Coran, chattering about whatever thing it was she was thinking about.

"I'm going to go bond with Black. Space dad out," Shiro said as he abandoned his bowl of goo and left the room/

"It's a day off?" Hunk popped his head in from the kitchen. "That's great! I wanted to try this new recipe that would mimic my mom's shortbread cookies."

"Hey," Lance snickered. "Pidge, remember that time he locked the three of us in a room at the start of our term at the Garrison and told you and I that we'd better fix whatever was going on between us-"

"And when we asked why, he said he baked his mom's shortbread cookies and was going to sit there and eat them until we made up!" Pidge finished, snorting into her bowl of food goo. "Yeah, good times."

Hunk grinned, looking proud. "I miss the Garrison days."

"Yeah, but the outer space days are amazing too! Remember our team chant?" Lance asked everyone. 

"Well, that depends," I said lightly, stirring my food goo and staring Lance in the eye. " _Do you remember the bonding moment_?"

"I told you," Lance began, voice rising steadily into a shriek. " _I don't remember it so it didn't happen_!" 

"I CRADLED YOU!" I shouted, standing up at the table. "I CRADLED YOU! YOU TOOK MY HAND- I CRADLED YOU AND YOU SAID- AND I QUOTE- "We did it. We are a good team." BITCH-"

"I NEVER SAID THAT!" Lance screeched. "AND IF I DID, I WAS DELUSIONAL!"

"WHY, YOU-" I slammed my hands down on the table when I heard a muffled noise, a cross between laughter and crying.

I turned around to see Krolia with her hands covering her mouth and tears streaking down her face. At the same time it looked like she was trying to hide a face-splitting grin, so I wasn't sure what to think.

"Krolia?" Lance asked gently. "You okay? It's fine, we're sorry- it's a thing we've had about this bonding moment that never happened that he swears happened-" I squawked indignantly but he shot me a glare and continued speaking. "-we're not really upset, it'll blow over in a few minutes. Just-  _please don't cry oh my god I don't know how to handle this I'm sorry_ -"

"It's not that," she interrupted, eyes shiny with tears. "It's just... you two remind me so much of my husband and myself."

"Dad?" I asked carefully. "We remind you of you and- and Dad?"

"When I crash landed on Earth in that pod, your father came running outside with his axe and broke open the pod. He got me out of there and in the house moments before it- the pod, I mean- exploded. I fell unconscious eventually but I remembered a little... enough to realize that I had to be rescued by a human from my own ship. When the embarrassment of that sunk in, I denied remembering anything. At all. He was genuinely insulted that I claimed not to remember. I think he nearly cried over it once. You know, I never told him that I remembered. And I never told him how grateful I was that he had basically saved my life that day," Krolia finished faintly, staring at us with something knowing in her eyes.

"But nothing happened between us! I emerged from the coma, shot Sendak's arm off, and-"

"-proceeded to fall unconscious again," I finished for him. "Like a little shit. And, of course I had to carry him back to the healing pods, since Allura was preparing them, Shiro could barely stand on his own two feet, Pidge was out of the question for obvious reasons, and Hunk and Coran were headed back to the Castle. I literally cradled your Cuban ass in my arms while you were high as a kite!"

"I told you- it- never- happened! I don't remember a fucking thing! This is all a figment of your imagination!"

"I swear, it's like deja vu," Krolia commented. "Your father and I once had this exact argument several years ago."

"I'm going to snap your neck like a quiznaking glowstick," I shouted, advancing around the table at the same time Hunk's gleeful voice rang out through the room.

"I'm finished! You guys have to try these, they are hands down the best recipe I have ever done. They taste just like how my mom made them!" Hunk placed a plate down on the table. Pidge, the gremlin she is, immediately abandoned her computer and dove for the plate, grabbing three at a time.

My stomach growled insistently, and I found myself torn between snapping Lance's neck and going for the plate. The delicious yet unfamiliar smell of homemade cookies wafted from the plate and I gave up my internal struggle, grabbing two cookies and handing one to Krolia while taking a bite out of my own.

"This is a circular shaped mass of sugar-infused carbohydrates," Krolia said, confused. "What do you expect me to do with this?"

"Well," I explained, mouth full, "it's a cookie. It's an Earth dessert."

"Hunk was trying to replicate a recipe that he and his mom used to bake together on Earth. And boy, did he ever succeed!" Lance interrupted, flashing our friend a grin.

Krolia sniffed her cookie hesitantly. "So... you're saying that moms on Earth bake these 'cookies' with their kits?" I nodded, not quite understanding what she was getting at. She took a careful bite and her eyes widened.

"It is surprisingly good," she said, impressed. We watched as she quickly finished it and brushed the crumbs off her hands with a determined look on her face. "I will make a Galra delicacy tonight," she said firmly. " _Makslov_ \- Ignolian peppers melted down with a root that you humans would call turnips into a puree and seasoned with ground Garnashi ore. It is a specialty among the Blades."

"You... are going to  _cook_?" I asked, raising an eyebrow.

"In Galran culture, to be entrusted with cooking is a sign of the greatest honour and of the highest respect. To be given the responsibility of providing nourishment for entire packs and maintaining health aboard the ship is one that not many Galrans are allowed to have. In the days of the ancients, friend and enemy alike were poisoned or sickened by food prepared by the wrong hands. This is why only the best are allowed to step foot in the galleys," she explained, face darkening. "A Galran meal for an Earth meal... yes, a fine trade. I hope you will allow me to prepare this meal for you all with as much trust as you place in the yellow paladin." Her gaze strayed to Hunk and she visibly relaxed.

"You all must trust and treasure him very much to grace him with such a noble task," she said as she got up from her seat and walked into the kitchen.

"She's right, you know," Pidge suddenly spoke up, making me jump a little. "He's like my first big brother among the paladins. Matt doesn't count because he's blood related to me, Lance is second because it took a while for us to stop fighting but when we did, I found out he was actually pretty cool. He never made anything weird."

"I thought shaving was a normal thing," Lance cut in, sounding genuinely confused. "Body hair is unhygienic. I mean, if you're into that sort of thing I'm not going to judge, but-"

" _Anyway_ ," Pidge said loudly, "Keith would be third big brother because he knows how to hide a body properly. That, combined with my extensive knowledge of various murder techniques is a great asset to have. Though I would like to know more about him than a) has a mullet, b) is emo, and c) is obsessed with knives, but I'll take what I can get."

"You know, if you wanted to  _bond_ you could have just asked, Pidge," I said, staring Lance down. 

"Shut the fuck up and let me finish my analysis of the paladin crew. Shiro doesn't count because he's space dad/vodka aunt, Coran is space uncle, and Allura is the big sister. But, in summation, we treasure and trust Hunk because he is our beautiful soft potato. We love him. We would kill an army for him. Fuck with him and you fuck with all of us."

"Word." Lance grabbed a cookie off the plate and took a bite as Hunk blushed from the roots of his hair, stammering about how we were over exaggerating.

"You are pure and beautiful and loved and perfect. We trust you with our lives. Accept it."

"She's right, you know," I added in. 

"You have been dubbed the most trusted out of all of us by a race of purple space cats," Lance declared, holding back laughter.

"Hold on a tick- does that make me half purple space cat?" I asked. Silence fell upon the room as everyone considered the question.

"Your father asked that exact question when you were born!" Krolia yelled from the kitchen. "You two are both fucking dumbasses, I swear to- being half-Galra does  _not_ make you half purple space cat, whatever that Earth creature even is!"

"Says the resident purple space cat," Hunk whispered, and we all busted into a fit of silent laughter.

"Hold on, now-" I wheezed, clutching my stomach. "Watch yourself, pal- that's my- my-"

 _Your what? Parent? Relative? Birthgiver?_  Panicking, one of the randoms titles slipped out.

"That's my birthgiver."

"Birthgiver?" Pidge wiped a tear from her eyes. "Oh my fucking quiznak-"

"Well, technically, he's not _wrong-_ " said Krolia from the kitchen.

"She goes by many titles," Lance said in a low tone. "Krolia- a Blade, spy, friend, enemy, assassin, birthgiver-"

"Shut  _up_ , Lance!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this whole thing got deleted halfway through and i cried.

**Author's Note:**

> I LOVE MY SWEET BBY KOGANES OK KROLIA AND KEEF BEING A FAMILY MAKES ME HAPPY INSIDE


End file.
